||[3rd November 2008|07:21 a]
oh the mini drama that is my home life continues....|
somedays it feels like my roommate wants nothing to do with me and would appreciate if I just moved out now because she's tired of my presence.
I just don't know what's going on with her.
she won't talk about anything. she won't say what's bothering her.... and I'm sick of bringing it up because I'm tired of always being the attacker. of always feeling like I'm the bad person... that everything wrong in this house is my fault and she is nothing but a flawless victim...
I don't feel like there's one big problem... just lots of smaller things that have just piled up.
things being broken, things not being taken care of, messes left out (the eggshells are the biggest thing to me), being excluded (and now sometimes it actually feels intentional).... there's just small things.... there's just a general lack of communication across the board in this place -- more than just between my roommate and I...
anyway... I just know that if my couch doesn't get fixed, it'll go on the IOU chart... (not the entire cost of the couch, but it won't be a small sum either -- that couch cost a decent amount. It was one of my investment pieces for when I get my own place.... not just something I found at a resale shop or on the side of the road...)
I'm tired of living situations like this. I thought once I left college things would change.... hopefully things with Chrissy will go well. At least I know if there's an issue, Chrissy will let me know and not just sulk about it.